In the martial arts, especially when we are at a rank closer to black belt, we begin to be exposed to other instructors and other ways of doing things. Sometimes this will align with the way our instructors taught us to do things and other times it will not. Every instructor presenting us with different ideas will agree with the importance of going back and checking with how our own instructors want things done.
Later on, when we are at the level of judging a regional black belt test, we will see different variances of how things are done. At this critical point for me at least, I had to ask myself, “What is the difference between preference and correctness?” After all, people passing or failing their black belt test was of consequence!
Martial arts are arts after all, so there will be room for interpretation with certain things. When looking at artwork whether it be photography, paintings, drawings or sculptures, there are certain rules that are typically followed, and the rest is up to the artist. The artist may follow all of the rules (or very intentionally break a select few) and have an objectively good painting, but some people may not subjectively like it. The piece of art was correct, some just did not prefer it. Art gets picked apart often with ease since in many cases the artist is not present when we are critiquing it, we can be brutal and unkind.
Let’s take a different example of how we may approach an interpersonal situation and how being brutal may seem absurd and rude. Imagine going to a gathering at someone’s home where the host objectively did a good job, but you simply did not enjoy yourself. Would you openly and rudely judge and criticize your friend? Probably not. After all, in this case, you and your preferences were responsible for not having a good time. If we are a picky eater, we may not enjoy certain food dishes even if they were made well. This is again our responsibility, not the cook’s. In a martial sense, we may prefer a deeper front stance or a higher kick, but a lower kick or a higher stance can still be correct.
In the first example of training with other instructors, they know when things are preferences and when things are right vs. wrong. As a student, if we try to accommodate everyone’s preferences, we will get confused and exhausted. When judging someone against a standard for a rank, we must put preferences aside and judge objectively off the standard. Finally, when we are critiquing people or their work, remember that it is possible to be honest and kind simultaneously. Also acknowledge when a critique is a matter of preference and not one of correctness. Doing these things will improve not only your abilities as a martial arts student or instructor, but they will also lead you to develop better rapport with those around you.
